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Dia Dynasty is a Chinese-American witch, sex worker and self-titled Shamanatrix. She's been featured on The Witch Wave podcast and in the collection of photography, Major Arcana: Witches in America, by Frances F Denny. You can find Dia Dynasty at her website or by following @FemDomFarm on Twitter.
Dia hales from New York where I reached her on the phone. She was doing something so relatable, getting her car fixed, and as a result of our connection, parts of the audio were hard to hear and difficult to transcribe, so I apologize in advance for that.
Please enjoy this discussion with Dia Dynasty where we talk about her vision for a piece of land called FemDom Farm, the concept of mothers and mothering and what it means to do acts of service. Transcript followed by embedded audio below:
Image from Twitter @DominaDynasty
Melissa (00:03):
Hey Dia, It's Melissa from FloodWitch. How are you?
Dia (00:09):
I'm good. I'm going to put in my earbuds
D (00:12):
I'm out on the street right now.
M (00:20):
Is now still a good time for you?
D (00:20):
Totally. Just let me know if you can hear me.
M (00:24):
I can hear you. I can hear you.
D (00:27):
Okay, good.
M (00:27):
Okay. You sound great. I can hear you very clearly.
D (00:33):
Good. Okay. How are you?
M (00:40):
I'm doing really well, and I appreciate you taking some time to talk to meand do something for my little blog that I'm trying to grow on marginalized spirituality. So I really appreciate that. And I, I came across you on The Witch Wave. And so I was really impressed with all the stuff that you said when you talked to Pam Grossman, but I just, I'm really glad that we were in touch. How are you today?
D (01:06):
I'm pretty good. I'm sitting here trying to get my car fixed, which is a really small thing compared to how the rest of the world is--how it's kind of falling apart. I am grateful for that, you know.
M (01:29):
Right. Yeah, absolutely. And it's been, it's been a wild year, right?
D (01:35):
Yeah. Quite a while. A couple of years.
M (01:41):
Yeah, absolutely. Well, I wanted to tell you a little bit about what I wanted to do sort of on this was I figured I would record our conversation if that's okay with you. And I wouldwrite a little article about you sort of based on the conversation and then embed the audio in there so that my readers can listen to it too. And you can kind of then speak to, to them and how you want them to contact you if you, if you want anyone to reach out to you or anything like that. But while we're kind of talking about the way that the last couple of years have been, so wild, one of the things that I wanted to ask you about as we start to talk about like who you are and what you do is, you know, A) kind of explain who you are, what you do, and then B) like how has this wild climate of COVID and everything that's been happening effected your industry and what you're doing today.
D (02:42):
In my most current incarnate, I am a Chinese American,usecond generation and,'m a 44 year old. Cisgender assigned female at birth,uI am Sagittarius sun, Leo moon and Aquarius rising. Umy Chinese zodiac is dragon, fire dragon. UI am also currently a professional dominatrix, a sex worker, meaning the same thing. Uuliving in upstate New York, where I am most recently an owner of land.
M (04:20):
That's awesome. So what's going on in the land and upstate
D (04:27):
This is kind of like my lifetime project where all the things that I value will culminate here. As of right now, I'm thinking ---we named it FemDom Farm. "Femdom" Meaning female dominatrix. And also it's a place that touching on quite a few things that I, that I've been working on. And so first of all, still feminism philosophy, with notes that women and earth and those resources that are left there alone--the impression and projection of our [inaudible]. To become aware of it, and decolonize outselves and our bodies and [inaudible].
M (05:40):
I think you're starting to break up a little bit on that last part. So I heard decolonize ourselves and then I kinda lost what you were saying after that.
D (05:50):
Okay so, decolonizing ourselves, our bodies, our minds, our environment with a relationship with nature. I know it sounds really ambitious also, but I think, you know, with with also these other kind of helpful aids that ideology like female domination and more specifically holistic femdom which is moreso, I guess like my niche in the BDSM community, as well as as well as the spiritual nature the holistic aspect and, and bringing that into our lives as like the way of living, rather than just like, small compartment of doing. I find that spirituality is that really kind of lacking really lacking in a lot of what we do and the reason we do things, so kind of want to bring that back. And and also, so as a, as a practicing witch, you know, like most of what I have learned in the places that I've been able to learn, it is from Europeans.
I am, I have really no connection to Europe or like Norse or like Viking mythology or anything like that, that a lot of kind of paganism comes from. I love, I love the idea of paganism. And, and I think that, you know, being kind of from America and born and raised here, I of course, like consider myself half American, but I also I am half Chinese. And I haven't really connected to the, to my other half of my ethnic background. So I've been, you know, looking more into that, but also recognizing that I am of two different worlds and each one is just as valid, you know, like, just because I look Chinese it doesn't mean that I'm not--that I have to shun my my American side. So so I feel like my American is actually has brought me to the place of my, my origin first, which is Ithaca, New York. And and so the farm, The FemDom farm is actually upstate not too far from Ithaca, but I've been learning a lot more about the indigenous culture that, that basically lived there before the land was stolen from them. And considering that more close to my origin, than like any other like European.
M (09:13):
Right. Yeah. And learning about what we did as Americans here in the states. We see a lot of that in Maine. That's where I am, but we have pretty strong indigenous roots up here too. And, you know, it's just, it's, it's nice to acknowledge and recognize that. So you're, how are you doing that with the farm or in your own ways, or what kind of research are you doing? What did you come across?
D (09:40):
So I was taking, or am still taking, a native [seed] stewardship course with a woman named Rowan White, who lives on the West Coast, but her roots are Akwesasne [Mohawk] Of the, the people that actually did live in that area where the farm is what the colonizer called the Mohawk Valley and they're a part of the Iroquois Nation.
So there's a really rich history there that if you can do enough sweeping on the internet, you can find like journals. There's actually still a council of elders up there. So that's, that's one of the resources that I haven't been to yet, but the seed stewardship is like a self-paced online course that talks a lot about the more scientific, you know, like biological information that you could learn about or start studying or whatever. But it also woven in to basically a lot of storytelling and a lot of broader ideas and philosophies about food and earth and the mythology of both. And the idea of stewardship, the idea is kind of rematriation which is a term that was made up from repatriation.
But of course, like, you know, bringing more focus into the idea of mother and motherhood rather than father and fatherhood. Um so it's been really, really kind of like a whole re-education on like how we choose seeds that we plant and how we are relatives in all of this stuff and not just like--these aren't just things we collect or products that we know that are extracted from factories. Like we all share some DNA.
M (12:13):
Yeah, absolutely. That's awesome. That's awesome.
D (12:16):
Yeah. That's amazing. Like, like humans share DNA with plants. It's awesome! Considering the relativity of our lives and how we all depend on each other and grand scheme of Earth. Like it's important to consider like what, you know, part that we play in all of it and not try to dominate it.
M (12:45):
That's so important too. I mean, I think, and I think in America, I mean everywhere, but in America we have that kind of culture of colonialism and imperialism and, you know, trying to be the best, you know, and we forget the the connection that you're talking about. It sounds like you have sort of had to restructure your paradigm a little bit or chose to restructure your paradigm a little bit. And you've included that as like your whole holistic worldview with, with what you're working on in your work and the FemDom Farm and the spirituality, it's like all connected.
D (13:20):
Yeah. Yeah. It's all connected. Like we're all connected every single person on this planet, every single animal, every single blade of grass. So every single speck of color, like we are all connected and to think that you're not connected, you're better than all of it. It's just really kind of a mentality. That's been disliked.
M (13:46):
It's how people kind of like rationalize the destruction of being a person. Right. But we do a lot of damage and we don't try to minimize it because we don't think about it the way that you're thinking about it. But we could, we could minimize it. We could do more eco, feminist type stuff.
D (14:07):
We could we could, we could do a lot more caring in general, but I also know that, you know, because of the mentality, a lot of people have suffered. It's for the people that have suffered. There's been all kinds of people, you know whether racially or gender based or economically, all kinds of people have suffered a lot of the suffering create divisions and, and that kind of division kind of also like allows for the mentality of separation, of "I don't know anybody anything and nobody's going to take care of me. So I don't--I'm not going to take care of anybody. And I would, you know, I was under the impression that these social contracts applies to everybody, but only may apply to certain people. And so like, fuck your social contract." There's a lot of woundedness and a lot of pain and suffering in the world by the hands of men. And I don't mean men, I mean humans. So I think it's important to also take accountability and responsibility for things that could have been done better.
M (15:29):
Yeah. That's great. It's interesting to hear how our, the conversation comes around to this, because it's something that you mentioned, I think when you were talking to Pam Grossman, was that there's this misconception that in this kind of like dominatrix sort of lifestyle that, that there's cruelty, or there's like, you know, like that there's this, this lack of compassion, but you're obviously very compassionate and you're very connected and you feel connected to people and to plants and to humanity and to saving, you know, conserving things and doing less damage. And I think that would be something that people don't typically would expect when they think about that kind of work. Right.
D (16:12):
Yeah. You're absolutely right about that. I think most people, when they hear the word dominatrix or BDSM, there's images that comes to mind of stuff like, like cruel, you know, leather clad, like whip-wielding, who will like humiliate you or whatever, and some like that as a fantasy, yeah, I play that role some times. But overall the, the BDSM community is extremely caring for each other and for ourselves, you know, like we're relatively non-regulated. Non-Regulated like, I guess, workforce a lot of FemDoms are women so there, there is a kind of natural, compassionate empathy that comes with being a woman.
D (17:23):
And so, you know, there are definitely professional doms, who maybe don't advertise or promote that aspect of their humanity and that's totally fine, you know? But I think overall the professional doms that I know, the ones I've met are all extremely caring and we, you know, even if we don't have a formal network, we all try to help each other to provide mutual aid care for each other.
And if somebody's in suffering or you know, like really needs some kind of funds and we all chip in for them. Or we all just try to, you know, we're not relying on like welfare, we're not relying on the government, relying on authorities to help us because both pretty much every experience that we've had, where we strive to rely on these like authority has failed us.
So we know that we can rely on ourselves. It's kind of care economy is one that I definitely want to nurture and grow as the FemDom Farm. Because I see that it is more human based and very heart connected rather than you know, heavily empathetic and compassionate, rather than like having to fill out these forms and go through these like judgments of, of being like a sex worker, or being poor, or being Black and being looked down on and rejected because of these like really silly principles.
M (19:10):
Yeah, absolutely. And that's sort of what I'm, I'm seeing a lot of that too in the witch community of people wanting to take care of each other and support each other and support their own economies and, you know, be, be there for each other in the ways that some people rely on government agencies and things. I think that that's an important shift. The farm itself. What kind of, what, what do you, what do you see as your vision, like, tell me, like for the person who is reading about this or listening what it is and, and what you want them to get from it.
D (19:45):
Okay. So so the farm is, I'll just describe it like kind of as a physical space, it is 80 acres of upstate gorgeousness. Um half of it is wooded, so there's a wildness to it. There are mushrooms, there's a couple of streams. There's like crazy growth everywhere. And then the other half is pastures where there are cows that come in, and graze the pastures, but they're our neighbors cows. And and then there are physical structures. Like there's a farmhouse, there's a guest cottage, there's a bar, there's a heifer shed where the cows hang out. There are silos and a little sugar shack in the woods for for maple collection and cooking.
D (20:42):
So it is, it is physically set up for all kinds of stuff. And one of my, one of my grand visions is to have retreats where it's like, you know, maybe the retreat is a spiritual retreat for witches to learn something like foraging or like handcrafting. Maybe like fiber crafting, like basket weaving, or like how to make fibers out of, out of like the dog bane or the grapevines or whatever that goes by. And, and then of course, you know, like based on consent the retreat guests would come and possibly be exposed to some elements of FemDom.
As well as yeah. As well as like, if they want to engage you know, this would be of course, like spiritually based and nature based as thematically a retreat for witches. But of course there would be other elements that they could be close to if they felt welcome and open to it. Um and, and then so like you know, of course like a program like that with would require some orientation and stuff like that. And, and of course, like, you know, people could camp, if they wanted to, and the weather was nice or they could use the houses. And we would all ideally gather around some sort of feedback sort of like take an event or, or maybe even just, you know, full moon or new moon.
So, so that would be, that's like one, one idea. Another idea is if it was more of a, of a kink-related or BDSM-related retreat, like outing, then there would be, of course, servitude or whatever identified as their server. But their service wouldn't be necessarily something that was centered on like their, their orgasms. It would be more around true service which is larger than just one person, although that, that one person that they're serving, would also benefit almost like a reeducation of including like The Mother.
Bringing spirituality into the mix, there would be some sort of something like if they qualify to be, I guess, more of service to the farm cause there are, you know, there is this intent of us serving our community out there too, but also maybe like, for as long as they wanted to. So it's a lot of different ideas that that will overlap. And, and also, you know, like becoming a steward of the land and learning about plants and nature and everything out there. I feel like this is-- it's like everything that I wanted to share with the world to have like a destination that people could learn, whether they are fearful, whether they're addicted, whether they're witches, whether they don't fit in to whatever in society, like what a man's supposed to be, or what a woman's supposed to be, like whatever, whatever it is, it's a very open place.
M (24:52):
That's wonderful. That's wonderful. Do you see your guests are getting something out of it in terms of what they like from an erotic standpoint, but also they're getting a spiritual sort of sort of retreat as well.
D (25:11):
Yeah, absolutely. And the satisfaction of like working.
M (25:20):
Grounding on nature, working with your hands.
D (25:26):
Yeah, it's something that I feel like not a lot of city folks get the opportunity here.
M (25:36):
Wonderful. I'm happy for you in that opportunity, that presented itself, that you were able to kind of seize and then make it happen because was, it was any of that inspired by the fact that during COVID everything has been a little isolated that you're kind of rethinking of community. Yeah.
D (25:54):
Yeah, 100% and also. I forgot to mention this early on, but like first and foremost this spot is a place for the idea of mother, but also the reality of my mother and I, and our lives. You know, like she is my, my closest family. I'm an only child. And thank you. I mean, I think that was super important to talk about too because I have a lot of friends, but I don't really hear them talking about their parents, you know? I hear about them talking about what their relationships are like and stuff like that.
And that might not be, you know, where our company gets together, but it's important to honor our elders, like, you know, consider the things that our ancestors have done for us. How we've got here, how we are able to see the how situations are and know the things that we know because of them.
Um so as you know, my mother is my elder. My priority with the farm is we both know she's going to die someday. She is in her seventies and she's healthy. And she's in Texas right now, but there's going to come a day when she's not going to be able to take care of herself. And the whole idea is like telling my mom she's going to some group home or whatever. I'm sure that there are lots of really great things about some of them, but for me, I want my mother and I want to be able to take care of her. So, this place is a place for my mother it's a forever home for us when wee finally moved out there permanently, we can start a little garden together. And hopefully we can grow things, like daikon and bok choy, that are more familiar, cultural cooking
M (28:20):
And I think that's really great that you mentioned it too. And could you talk about the concept of mother a couple of times, and I'm now talking about your literal mother. Um we, we just did something very similar. We moved out to Maine with my parents and like a duplex type house on like an acre or two.
And so I'm very familiar with like the living with like the realization you're, you know, you're getting, you're getting older, your parents are getting older and, and like, I understand what you're saying about your elders and, and feeling connected spiritually to my ancestors, all kind of came into this idea to move out to like this kind of wild area with my parents. But it's not something that, that people, when I interview them, they usually bring up, you know, like they don't usually talk about their parents. So I think it's interesting that you mentioned it, that that you find it to be an important part of your spirituality and important part of respecting your elders and respecting your ancestors. That, that's, that's a, an interesting concept. I think a lot of people think about, but they don't talk about, I don't know why.
D (29:16):
Well, I mean, you know, I'm not sure why yet, maybe one day we'll ask somebody. It's just not on the, on the forefront of our minds. And it's not something that like that we like, necessarily want to bring into our identity. Which is cool and fine, but I think it's really important and I know not everybody has a positive relationship with their parents or even has their parents around.
M (30:03):
Right. Absolutely. Everybody's family situation was different and the idea of family and the concept of family. But I think as we age, we do tend to want to bring whoever our concept of family is kind of closer, you know, it becomes more important. Yeah.
D (30:20):
Yeah. I hope so. I see that happening and I think its really great that you moved to Maine, um, with your parents. And I love that, you know, to understand ourselves, why we what we think about ourselves, that our parents had a big part in it and sometimes people don't want to acknowledge that, or they have some kind of trauma around it, yeah. That could be a sore spot or a hard thing to talk about.
M (31:02):
So how do you think if some, if somebody is having that baggage, when they're at, when you think about your farm and you're kind of surrounded by this concept of motherhood, do you think that that's something that could people could use as sort of like a form of shadow work?
D (31:15):
Oh, absolutely. Okay. So I just watched [inaudible] for the second time, the new one. And toward the end there's this, like, there's this really intense ritual with all this blood and all this gore happening. But in the midst of it, in the midst of it, there was kind of just like surprise. And, and what happened was that I guess the main character, the younger main character he came to represent this other mother, like a dark mother, and, you know, there was this like call to renounce your own mother favor of the other mother that was that, that that could give you more power or make you a better dancer, whatever it is.
And this idea of renouncing your mother. I think it's interesting because not everybody's mother was, you know, granted they birthed you, they may not have nurtured you, they may not have helped you. They may have hurt you. And I think that the role of mother you know, bring life into this earth. I would hope that, that you consider the responsibilities and self-reflection . And, and some people, you know, have suffered because of that lack of affection. A lot of people have, and so, so, you know, I think that, I don't know if renouncing is necessarily a necessary thing, but I think for some people maybe who have suffered a lot, maybe that could be one of the things that's like almost like clear in a way so that you can make space for your other mother, which is like birth mother.
And I guess in some indigenous cultures, there's a story of a sky woman who, her body became like corn, water and animals and the mother that always provides for you. Like, if you're looking for something to eat, now, there are fruit trees, forageable edibles, there are mushrooms. And these things are abundant from our mother and I feel like this greater mother is, you know, of course does contain a dark side is capable of wrath, but it's expected, but like, it's also been a thing that holds you and feeds you and gives you fibers to clothe you. You know, works herself for you. And so this other idea, just like more expansive ideas, mother, I feel like it's going to be a lot more palatable. And maybe accessible to somebody that has suffered from their actual mother.
M (35:05):
Yeah. That's cool. That's good. And I'm so excited to hear it too, to just see how, how this FemDom Farm develops. I'm definitely going to touch base with you in the future and just kind of see what's going on with you. I don't want to keep you too long though. Are there any last final notes or any places you'd like for my readers listeners to contact you?
D (35:26):
Yeah. So I I didn't really talk much about this but the FemDom Farm is also going to be this amazing space for, for rituals that involve BDSM or a space for BDSM that involves ritual. So it can be like kind of, you know, ratio one way or another, depending on I think it's also going to be feeling safe. So I would encourage people to come visit and connect with me on the FemDom Farm Twitter @FemDomFarm. But there's also, I have another Twitter account, which is @DominaDynasty. And then I, and then I have a website with dominadynasty.com and that's, that's more for my more like straight BDSM work, but I'm crafting, I'm kind of revamping it more more about rituals that can be done. So yeah, there's a few ways.
Melissa is a freelance journalist and lifestyle blogger covering emerging trends in wellness, politics and spirituality with an advocacy and public health focus. A lover of art, she's a self-proclaimed nerd, a fan of cosplay, TTRPGs, and a Latine mother in residing in New England United States. Though heavily influenced by her upbringing in Florida and around the world. She is the publisher of Floodwitch Community Post and sole proprietor at Temperance Media.